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	The Abandoned Station		*NEWS*

Exhibits Videos Writings Larry's Wad Topical Runoff Bios Details Contact Us F.A.Q. Links Nothing Nothing Nothing	No, it's not your computer. It's your mind.	Props of the Week: Dave Navarro This wonderful digital book of brain-cracked poetry is now available for mega-purchase. Click HERE because you are a good, cultured uber man (or woman) wanting more information.	*March.7/10* *Weirdest new short story yet. No, like, 'fucked up' weird: Machine Reflects* *Feb.21/10* *New Larry's Wad: Blog-like blather from "Larry's" recent trip to Gotham* *Feb.5/10* *Weird new short story that has nothing to do with Feb.5: Dreams* *Jan.19/10* *New Larry's Wad: Can You Get Your Humanity Back?* *Jan.10/10* *The third issue of Tarana Ding Dong is now available in digital format. Shout it from the rooftops!* *Dec.30/09* *Topical Runoff: 2009 in Review* *Dec.23/09* *Weird new short story that has nothing to do with christmas: Somewhere Between History and Memory* *Dec.15/09* *New music from that sonic rogue Copper Squid called 'Atomic Ave'. Here is the webpage to learn more.* *Dec.8/09* *New Larry's Wad: My/Our Favourite Things* *Nov.20/09* *Topical Runoff: And Just Who Might You Be?* *Nov.15/09* *Tarana Ding Dong's Second issue is now available here in digital form. Hoo-fucking-ray!* *Nov.3/09* *New Soundchecks: Thom Yorke Solo - An Appraisal* *Oct.20/09* *New Short Story: Five Simple Dollars* *Oct.5/09* *Larry's Wad: Pieces of Green - the 'new' environmental movement* *Sept.19/09* *New Topical Runoff: Fight Club Redux* *Sept.12/09* *Tarana Ding Dong's first issue is now available here in digital form.* *Sept.04/09* *Digital Poetry Book 'Brief Tales of Compromised Solutions' available for purchase.* *Plus new 'other' poetry* *Aug.18/09* *Larry's Wad: Corporations as Countries as Corporations* *Aug.04/09* *Short Story: The Autopsy of Brilliance (Part Two) (see, because we broke it up into two updates, we can go camping)* *Aug.01/09* *Uh, apparently we are a publishing company now: Tarana Ding Dong* *July.27/09* *New Short Story: The Autopsy of Brilliance (Part One)* *July.13/09* *Topical Runoff: Michael Jackson versus Robert McNamara* *June.30/09* *Sound Checks: A Gen Y Perspective on Michael Jackson* *June.21/09* *Larry's Wad: America DOA* *June.10/09* *Uh, apparently we're a record label now: Copper Squid* *June.3/09* *Topical Runoff: Guaranteed Ways to Have a Bad Trip on Hallucinogens* *May.18/09* *Sound Checks: Animal Collective Analysis and Concert Review* *May.4/09* *Topical Runoff: Hell versus Shit* *April.21/09* *New short story: Steel, Girder and Glass* *April.8/09* *New Larry's Wad: Oh Zeitgeist, My Zeitgeist (9/11 Conspiracy Theory)* *March.26/09* *More Poetry. Yeah, more of it.* *March.13/09* *New short story: Three Suns in the Sky* *March.1/09* *Topical Runoff: The Internet is Making Me Hate Democracy* *Feb.13/09* *New Larry's Wad* *Jan.30/09* *The Ten Most Offensive Songs of All Time in Sound Checks* *Jan.14/09* *Fawning over Fleet Foxes in Sound Checks AND new skit Just Scratching the Surface* *Dec. 31/08* *Topical Runoff: 2008 Year in Review Part Two AND the Underwhelming Art Exhibit* *Dc.28/08* *Topical Runoff: 2008 Year in Review Part One* *Dec.14/08* *New writing section: Poetry (that's right. Wanna fight about it?)* *Nov.30* *Topical Runoff: A Pothead's Guide to Children's Television* *Nov.12/08* *New story: The Port in Tangier* *Oct.29/08* *Larry's Wad: The Last Week* *Oct.13/08* *New Exhibit: Nuit Blanche Night Shift* *Oct.1/08* *Topical Runoff: Burn After Reading...* *Sept.15/08* *New story: The Talking Duck* *Sept.1/08* *Larry's Wad: Veep! Veep! and Topical Runoff: Shut the Fuck Up, Pollsters!* *Aug.19/08* *Sound Checks: All Points West Festival Review* *Aug.3/08* *New Skit: Instruction Manual* *July.21/08* *Updated Exhibit: When Jokes Die - Politics Again - Obama's Big Black Dick Jokes* *July.6/08* *Larry's Wad: Obama - Honeymoon Over?* *June.23/08* *Topical Runoff: George Carlin (1937-2008)*
		Timetables Coming Soon! (in the meantime, why dontcha wander down to your closest intercity rail system station and ask for the first ticket out your jerkwater berg?)
	This is a computer. It is an electronic device that can store large amounts of information and display high quality digital images of young women giving unidentifiable men blowjobs. You probably recognize it, because you are more than likely using one now to view this page (if you are viewing this page without the aid of a computer, please send us a telepathic message immediately).
		See, originally we were going to start a webpage of just stuff like this, but you'd be surprised how few sexually suggestive body parts there truly are. I mean, has anyone really seen a Fallopian tube? "Oh, sir! That's funnier than a vegetable that has grown into a rude and amusing shape!" - Private Baldrick, Blackadder
	Another urban legend laid to rest. All twenty six are present and accounted for. And no, we did not maul a 'u' to create the 'j'.
		While we do not necessarily hold the views of the scrawl to the right (a world without freedom of expression and chili fries is not a world anyone should be forced to live in), we can't help wondering if our species would be better off still living in caves and being victim of run-by stonings and saber-toothed tiger attacks instead of being subject to greenhouse gases and way too many unstable people with high powered rifles (although one had much less choice in TV programming back then, that's for sure). A skit inspired by the photo.
	things that could make this website better: -shiner graphics -ads that encourage you to shoot the duck, catch the fly, lasso the cow, feed the monkey, denounce the racist, etc. so you can win an iPod -lesbians (obviously) -a conservative columnist -coupons for your local grocery store -explosions (only ones with fire. And actually, that reminds us of a giant explosion in Die Hard 2 where this plane is deliberately given incorrect altitude information by terrorists so it crashes in a massive fireball, despite the fact that the fuel tanks are nearly empty, which is acknowledged by the pilots, the terrorists, and the airport personnel) things we promise to work on in our third year: -potty training (don't worry, we'll videotape it) -speech development (according to blankees.com, this website should put two or three words together, follows simple directions, and understand basic questions like, 'where is your nose?') -reuniting the czech and slovak republics (of course the capital will still be Prague) -less references to nineties action movie sequels -something more family friendly. like incest jokes. and perhaps taking an unusual stand on gay adoption. -we'll finally get to the bottom of whether soft drugs truly are softer than their supposedly 'harder' counterparts	The top photo is cancer. The photo below is not.